Saint Ignatius College Geelong
Dear Saint Ignatius College Geelong community members,
Fr James Puppady has been a tremendous support to the College in his leadership role as President of the Association of Canonical Administrators for the last four years. So it is with sadness, I inform you that the Archbishop has asked Fr James to move and lead two parishes in the northwest of Melbourne. Fr James will commence in his new position on June 9.
At Saint Ignatius College, we will miss him. As well as President, he has been a Canonical Administrator, Board member and College Chaplain for nine years. Fr James has celebrated many Masses, spoken at assemblies and significant school functions. His friendly, enthusiastic and generous nature has been appreciated. In particular, his involvement with the student group we sent to the Australian Catholic Youth Festival in Perth in 2019 was very much appreciated by all those involved.
Fr James with Bishop Mark Edwards and Mr Michael Exton at the blessing of the Mutlipurpose Centre in 2019.
Fr James’ story is one of courage and commitment. His approach to his vocation reflects our school motto, “to love and to serve.” Fr James was born in Trichur, Kerala State, India and was ordained to the Priesthood for the Vijayawada Diocese, Andhra Pradesh State, India, on 18 April 1993. He then worked for 19 years as a Parish Priest in that diocese and was a member of the Bishop’s Council of Priests.
Fr James was very active in serving the people in his parishes in India. He sought funding and donations to support his work to provide education for poor students. He also raised funds to support many other projects with which he was involved. These included:
In 2012, Fr James moved from India to serve the Melbourne Archdiocese. After only one month in Melbourne to familiarise himself with his new country, Fr James was placed in Drysdale to administer the Parish after the retirement of the then Parish Priest, Fr Des Panton. Since then, Fr James has worked enthusiastically in his new country and, particularly, serving and enhancing the Drysdale Parish. After a short time, Fr James was appointed Drysdale Parish Priest in recognition of his competency and dedication. And as a further sign of his commitment, he became an Australian Citizen.
After his successful nine years at Drysdale, it was no wonder that he has been asked to take on the ‘mission’ to combine two parishes, St Paul’s Coburg and St Oliver Plunkett’s Pascoe Vale.
I am sure parents/guardians, students, and staff are grateful for his generous and valuable support. On behalf of our College Community, I express our gratitude to Fr James and wish him all the very best for his future. I ask you to please keep Fr James in your prayers as he commences his new appointment. Please also pray for his mother and family in India at this worrying time of great uncertainty.
As you are probably well aware, yesterday, Acting Premier James Merlino announced that the lockdown restrictions currently in place would be easing in regional Victoria from 11:59 pm on today, Thursday 3 June, if testing shows there continue to be no new cases.
Therefore, we are looking forward to all year levels and students returning to face-to-face learning from tomorrow, Friday 4 June.
All students (except those with exemptions) will need to carry a mask and wear it indoors and on buses. I ask that you please check that your daughter or son has a mask with them each day. Please do not send them to school if they are unwell. If your daughter or son exhibits cold or flu like symptoms while at school, we will contact you and ask you to please take them home.
Well done to our students for managing another period of remote and flexible learning and to families for all you have done to support the students during this time.
Thank you for your ongoing support of the College and everything you are doing to keep our school community and the wider community safe.
Best wishes,
Michael Exton Principal
We have certainly had a busy fortnight at the College as ‘school life’ ramps up as we move rapidly toward the end of the Semester. The week long lock down has been a frustrating but necessary interruption to our events but fortunately almost all of our Reconciliation Week events occurred before remote learning began. Toby Mew and Tory Wood who are both members of the College’s FIRE Carrier community must be acknowledged for the enormous amount of energy and organisation they have put into this year’s events.
The 2021 theme of Reconciliation Week is ‘More than a word: Reconciliation takes action’, and therefore Reconciliation Week is underscored by the word ‘sorry’. In 2008, the then Prime Minister Kevin Rudd used this word to acknowledge the countless wrongs of the past and enable genuine dialogue around reconciliation to occur. Words matter.
Sorry is a powerful word that not only acknowledges wrong but is also contrite and penitent in nature. When we are sorry and acknowledge that we allow dialogue to begin, ego to be put aside and relationships to be rebuilt. Before we can be sorry for an action or choice we must find the humility to acknowledge wrong. This can be difficult but is essential if healing it to occur for ourself and for others.
During the events held at the College during Reconciliation Week the word sorry was the key theme offered by Toby Mew (Social Justice Captain) during the planting of ‘our’ Illawarra Flame Tree in the Remembrance and Reflection Garden. The following transcript illustrates the power words can have and sincerity Toby and our College has in regard to reconciliation.
Today we acknowledge that we are gathering together on sacred land.
We acknowledge the traditional custodians of this land – the Wadawurrung People of the Kulin nation.
This land has been under their care for thousands of years.
We recognise their ongoing connection with this land and it’s waters.
We also pay our respects to their elders, past and present.
Today we say Sorry.
Sorry for the injustices that the Indigenous People of this land have endured. We remember the Stolen Generations and the impact that their forced removal has had.
We acknowledge their strength and resilience in continuing to be the oldest living culture in the world.
We plant this Illawarra flame tree as an act in Reconciliation and as a reminder of our continued commitment as FIRE carriers to walk with the First Nations People of this land to bring about harmony, understanding and respect.
We hope that this tree provides a place for students and staff to connect with nature and as a reminder of our pledge for Reconciliation.
Our Sorry Day service was a whole school event that announces annually our continued commitment to the process of reconciliation. The smoking ceremony and the words of our guest speaker, Inala Cooper, who is a descendant of parents from the Stolen Generation were both powerful Illustrations of how an honest examination of history and the resilience of Indigenous people offers our nation a way forward.
Respecting others and caring for those in need are foundational aspects of our faith and central to the teachings of Jesus. In the modern day, we as a College apply this vision to reconciliation and the obligation to educate our community. The symbols used to illustrate this commitment, including the flame tree, are only worthy if they are supported by a sound commitment and desire to commit to the process of reconciliation.
At the College we are well placed to continue on our journey. We have FIRE Carriers and staff who have a passion toward reconciliation and leadership within the College who enable and support this process. As we enter into the next twelve months of our reconciliation journey we look toward deeper relationships with the Wadawurrung community based upon the core teachings of Jesus. In doing so we will continue to use words carefully and with a level of sophistication acknowledge that we as a community are ‘sorry’.
Yours in Christ,
Brendan Nicholls Liturgy Coordinator
“I will give thanks to you Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of your wonderful deeds.” Ps: 9:1.
My dear staff, students, parents/guardians and non-teaching staff,
Thanksgiving is one of the most important elements of worship. We recognise God’s presence in our lives. This does not only glorify God, it trains us to be more aware of God’s care in our lives. Gratitude is adapted from the Latin word “gratitudinem,” which means “thankfulness.” We need to recognise the blessings in our lives and cultivate a thankful spirit. So we need to develop an attitude of gratitude. This gratitude should come from the bottom of our hearts. If you look at Psalm 23, you will find it is a powerful reflection on God’s goodness. It is all about God’s care, spiritual renewal, his discipline and his protection. So it is very important to recognise the loving hand of God’s providence in our lives.
Now I would like to thank the Almighty God for his great providence and blessings throughout my life. I would like to thank all the bishops and priests who have supported me during the nine years of my journey at Drysdale. I would like to express my sincere gratitude to all those connected to Saint Ignatius College Geelong, located at Drysdale. We have an excellent principal, great staff, lovely students, very supportive parents/guardians, very expert board members and hard working non-teaching staff. Over the last nine years, I have witnessed that the College is growing day by day. It has a very good reputation as a connecting Jesuit Companion school. I have really enjoyed assisting with different programs at the College. Throughout my time at Saint Ignatius College, I have been a chaplain, a board member, and the President of the Canonical Administrators for four years. I have learned and experienced a lot from the staff and students.
My dear staff, you are great examples for your students through your faith and exemplary teachings. Always maintain your Catholic identity, not just by saying but by practising the faith. Your unity creates the best atmosphere in the school. You must have a strong relationship with God and your community where you share God’s love.
Fr James with our then College Vice Captains, William Palmer and Heidi Bakker, at the Australian Catholic Youth Festival in Perth in 2019.
We need to have values in our life. If you buy and accumulate lots of luxuries, bear in mind that the most important and valuable things cannot be purchased with money. In your adolescent years, you are healthy and fit, but you do not possess a lot of money. In later years when you are a young adult, you will have possession of both health and wealth but lack time. And when we age, we will retain the money and gain time, but lose our health.
What do you truly mean by “love”? When you are preparing to go on a journey alone, but a voice says, “Don’t worry, I am here with you,” there is a certain security and safety in that tone. The phrase “I’m here with you” evokes such joy and comfort. Let us not only pour out our sorrows but also listen to others’ sorrows and pains too. Then we may experience some relief from our pains and sorrows. Real friendship is a form of extremely heartfelt attachment. The depth, breadth and value of such relationships transcend distance, time and seasons. Have the true treasures of life. I hope all parents and children will connect with their community, especially through the Eucharistic celebration where we share God’s Agape love.
I would like to express my gratitude to all the College’s Canonical Administrators and my fellow Priests for their support and advice.
Now I am leaving the parish, but I am not leaving you. Each and every one of you has a special place in my heart. I thank you for your love, concern, care, support and prayers.
Finally, knowingly or unknowingly, if anything I have done or offended you, kindly forgive me. Once again, a big thanks to all of you. I wish you all the best. God bless you all, especially all the children, with a great future. You are always in my prayers. Kindly pray for me too. Sometimes I will come and see you too.
I have been appointed for six years as Parish priest of Pascoe Vale and Coburg parishes. You are most welcome to visit my parish.
Fr. Raymond Bugeja will be the Drysdale parish priest from the 9th of June 2021 onwards. He is a very good person and is a lovely priest. Kindly extend your cooperation and great support to him. God bless you all.
Yours sincerely in Christ,
Fr. James Puppady
President of the Canonical Administrators.
MARANATHA
After several false starts, we successfully enjoyed a wonderful camp experience at Mt Evelyn YMCA during Week 2 and 5 of this Term. It was an idyllic setting with no shops in sight but instead surrounded by beautiful bush and the sounds of native birds to wake us each morning. Upon rising, many gravitated to the welcoming fire to warm themselves up before they heard the cow-bell to line up for breakfast. This was a huge affair with both continental and a cooked breakfast on offer and we were left feeling so full after the bacon, scrambled eggs, pancakes or hash browns, as well as cereal, yogurt, fruit or toast.
Then it was off for a full day of activities, ranging from high ropes and the giant swing to bike riding and damper cooking. One favourite was “Initiatives” where a problem was given and the team had to solve it using teamwork, ingenuity and lateral thinking. This certainly tested a few but there many achievements too. The crate stack, likewise, was about teamwork and supporting your peer whilst he/she climbed atop crates without tipping them over. Luckily there were no unfortunate spills as the climber was securely harnessed and protected by the YMCA staff. Some hit the bull’s eye in archery and many budding architects were discovered with the hut building, where the real test of the structure’s viability was whether it could survive the bucket of water being tipped over the roof to see if the builders inside the hut got wet. That was a good incentive to have no holes and a thick layer as the roof.
The first night we had a formal evening where students dressed in outfits suitable for 5-star dining and there were some magnificent displays of jewels, suits, gowns and a few unusual bohemian creations. Students were invited to mingle with new people and there were ‘conversation starters’ to help prompt these conversations. On the second night, there was a movie night which was a welcome, relaxing way to unwind and reflect gratefully on the time together and the new insights gained. Staff gave out prizes to those who’d pushed themselves well outside their comfort zone, showed incredible resilience or courage, or gently encouraged a peer when he/she may have had some doubts. There were also acknowledgements to some who took on more than expected and did extra in the kitchen and clean-up, like emptying huge dishwashers or vacuuming. It all made for a harmonious and easy camp when students pitched in and generously supported staff in readying the dinner room for each meal or went to sleep when asked.
Congratulations to the students for being actively involved in all that was on offer and for showing the YMCA staff how respectful and grateful we were for accommodating us on such short notice, as well as devising a program that gave everyone a chance to test their limits of endurance ( & for some, fear of heights) and have fun! We were sad to leave this incredibly beautiful place and the outstanding YMCA staff who cared for us.
Huge thanks also to the Saint Ignatius College staff who took on the responsibility of supervising and nurturing 125 students whilst leaving their own families behind for three days. Your support was invaluable to the camp’s success! As we left the Dandenongs behind after our three days there, we took away many enjoyable and lifelong memories that cemented our common Ignatian values of leadership, service, inclusivity and compassion. Well done to all involved!
Deborah Hodge Year Level Coordinator: Year 8
Below are some recollections from the Ignatian leaders:
I really enjoyed YMCA at Mt Evelyn. The setting was great, the activities were really enjoyable and really pushed me out of my comfort zone. The camp staff were amazing and you could really tell how much they loved their job. They made sure we made the most of our camp experience. The camp experience was well organised and structured; teachers made sure we could have some time with friends outside of our camp groups which I know a lot of us really appreciated. The camp also gave me an opportunity to further develop friendships made at school. (Georgia Lyons, 8 Realino)
The camp setting was very nice; everything was easy to find and straight-forward to get to. The group I was in loved the activities; all of them were fun and engaging. They gave all of us a good challenge but we learnt lots of new things and made new connections with people we hadn't talked to before. The YMCA staff were friendly and welcoming and the program was very good. (Matilda Hughes, 8 Castillo)
We really were amazed when the bus pulled up in this driveway surrounded by all this amazing wildlife and greenery. The air was crisp and cool; you could hear all the birds chirping and the river trickling and the fire crackling. When we finally started our activities, the YMCA leaders were so nice and helped us to become confident and enjoy our experience. All the activities gave us a challenge and were all really fun but our favourite activities were the giant swing and archery. This camp also gave us a chance to meet other peers and build a stronger bond with our homeroom. We would like to say thanks to the YMCA staff and the teachers for allowing us to experience this. (Jacob Irwin & Steph Reynolds, 8 Campion)
The Year 8 camp was an absolute blast with it being based at the base of the Dandenong Ranges where nature and wildlife were thriving. I liked the serenity of it. The activities were amazing; there was the giant swing, crate stack, initiatives, damper cooking, hut building and bike ed, all of which were so much fun. The YMCA staff were fantastic too with how they ran the camp and managed us. They were super friendly and we were so stoked to have them there. (Ethan Hughes & Will Cunningham, 8 Montserrat)
I thought that the nature of this camp gave an instant feeling that this would be a few days outdoors. Surrounding the camps were beautiful trees and plants filled with amazing birds. There wasn’t a time in the day where you couldn’t hear these birds chirping. The best activities were the crate stack and the high ropes; these activities required teamwork and trust. The crate stack needed the team to be organising what crates should be passed up and at what time. They also had to stabilise the crates so that the person climbing could feel safe. The high ropes included 3 members holding the rope along with the instructor; this required a huge amount of trust between the person doing the high ropes and the people controlling the rope that stops you from falling. Fortunately, everyone was very responsible here. The YMCA staff were amazing, all very encouraging and welcoming to all students and teachers. They organised a well-thought out couple of days. We had a perfect schedule giving us kids time to get ready, eat, have some free time and complete all of the activities. Overall the camp was terrific - a great place to conquer your fear of heights! (Harriette O’Keefe, 8 Daniel)
I liked how the camp was in the middle of nowhere and where every part of the day you could hear the birds and other animals walking or making appearances. It was a spacious place where you could have fun with your friends. Some of the best parts were the activities. I thought that this experience made a really big difference at the camp. They had heaps of activities that exhausted you mentally and made you want to fall asleep after a full, long day. It was so good I didn’t want the days to end. Something that I most loved about the camp was forming more friendships with people; this made me feel more included with people I don’t normally hang out with at school. I made heaps of friends in my group, boys and girls, and others who weren’t in a group with me. I thought that the YMCA staff did a fantastic job is providing us with a good camp that none of us will forget. This made all of us feel more connected and welcomed into trying new things and or just having a go. (Mikayla Glibo, 8 Aikenhead)
It was good to finally go on our camp to Mt Evelyn in the Dandenong Ranges. The camp was set in the middle of a valley with tall gum trees surrounding it. There were two really friendly Kookaburras that liked to sit near us each day. The highlights included the high rope course, bush cooking and making new friends. (Isaac Naus, 8 Owen)
Congratulations to our Year 7and 9 students for undertaking NAPLAN. The tests were held in our Multipurpose Centre which is a fabulous venue with great lighting and heating. The Practice General Achievement Test (an abridged version) was also held for students studying a Unit 3 or 4 subject. Students received external feedback on their writing section.
Thank you to all staff and students for their adaptability and flexibility to the recent lockdown. It was great to see that students were able to respond positively to the expectations of remote and flexible learning.
VCAA has decided to change the date for the General Achievement Test. Currently they have not published a new date but we expect that it will be this term. Therefore, Wednesday 9 June, will be normal classes for all Year 11 and 12 students.Bernadette Donnelly Deputy Principal [Learning & Teaching]
Saint
Ignatius College respects the First Nations People of Australia. We pay
our respects to the Indigenous People of this country.
On May 26th,
National Sorry Day, we reflected on the mistreatment of those who were
forcibly removed from their families, cultures, languages and lands, The
Stolen Generation. We say sorry.
Students and Staff acknowledged
Sorry Day with a collaborative artwork that will be hung in the school
gallery. They were invited to contribute with the word Sorry to the
Aboriginal flag. The FIRE carrier students along with the College’s
Leadership Team planted an Illawarra Flame tree on the College grounds.
The tree acts as a reminder of our continued commitment as FIRE carriers
to walk with the First Nations People of this land to bring about
harmony, understanding and respect.
The College hopes that this tree provides a place for students and staff to connect with nature and as a reminder of our pledge for Reconciliation.
A video of the tree planting can be viewed below.
Tory Wood FIRE Carrier, ATSIC member
Last week, Saint Ignatius College commemorated Sorry Day, a significant event in the Australian calendar.
On this day, we apologise for the mistreatment inflicted on Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people, most notably the Stolen Generations.
We are grateful to Norm Stanley and Nikki McKenzie for welcoming us to Wadawurrung country and conducting a smoking ceremony for Saint Ignatius. We are also grateful to our guest speaker Inala Cooper, for her sharing her touching story about her family’s experiences with discrimination in Australia.
A video of the Sorry Day Smoking Ceremony can be watched below.
Toby Mew Student FIRE Carrier
On a cold and windy morning last week Year 11 VCE Environmental Science students ventured to Lake Lorne to conduct field sampling for their major investigation this semester.
The students were charged with creating their own investigation, monitoring and designing an experiment to investigate an issue at or around the Lake Lorne environment.
Environmental Science is an interdisciplinary field of research that contributes to solutions to environmental issues. It involves many areas of study including ecology, chemistry, geology, soil science, geography, meteorology and biology. The projects devised by students investigated pollution issues, vegetation cover and nutrient enrichment.
Students collected macroinvertebrates from the water, assessed vegetation cover and monitored dissolved oxygen, phosphorus, nitrogen and temperature levels in the lake. Their analyses and report writing will assist in highlighting the health of the Lake and giving the students an insight into the many variables, limitations and complexities of field based surveys.
Jessica Miller Science Teacher
On Monday 24th May, our Year 11 students travelled to Beckley Park for a one-day workshop presented by RYDA on road safety. The workshop sessions were led by a team of trained facilitators including a Fire Fighter, driving instructors and other community sector specialists.
Taking a student inquiry learning approach, students attended 6 different workshops to broaden their understanding of road safety. The workshops were titled Mind Matters, Speed & Stopping, Drive S.O.S., The ‘I’ in Drive, Road Choices and Crash Investigators.
The workshops featured highly engaging practical demonstrations, real-life narratives, videos, quizzes and interactive role play. These unique experiences gave students the tools to become informed drivers and see the impacts of their road choices.
In addition to this, students were provided the opportunity to set road safety goals and build strategies alongside the friends they will most likely be riding with, as drivers or passengers. All staff and students that attended were impressed with the quality of information on the day, and were very happy to be out on excursion together once again.
Alex Simpson Year Level Coordinator: Year 11
From Monday 17th through to Friday the 21st of May, the Year 12 VCAL students travelled to Serendip Sanctuary in Lara. Serendip is a wildlife sanctuary. We went there to take part in a pilot program called Design 2 Thrive. The program was an initiative of Parks Victoria and Geelong Technical School. The point of this program was to create a solution to help out Parks Victoria to look after animal welfare and land conservation.
Some of the animals who live at Serendip Sanctuary include emus, kangaroos, ducks, geese, lizards and birds. Our group consisted of Darcy, Cameron, Claudia and Eevee and we used VR Goggles and the 3D printer to make a fob and a gate design to open and close the gates automatically.
We thought this would assist the Park Rangers by giving them more time to spend with visitors, resulting in a better experience. Other groups addressed different issues like access to animal information and facts through QR codes, a mobile app for funding, information and resources and bird boxes for owls whose habitat is being destroyed.
Overall we had lots of fun and enjoyed the experience of being out at the Sanctuary and helping solve real world problems in the park. Thanks to all involved, in particular Parks Victoria and Geelong Tech School.
Cameron & Darcy Year 12 VCAL
On Monday 24th May, 20 Year 9 and 10 girls attended the GISSA 9/10 netball competition, after a number of weeks of training in preparation for this competition.
Over the day they played a number of games where they faced some tough competition but with skill and determination both teams were runners up at the end of the day losing to Clonard College, Geelong.
Well done to Tylah Foley and Sofia Dickson for being MVP for their teams. Congratulations to all of the girls for a great day. Thank you to Ms Georgia Robinson for helping coach the girls.
Unfortunately, the Senior GISSA Netball Competition was unable to proceed on Monday 31st May due to Lockdown. The girls had been training for this for a number of weeks, so it is a shame they were unable to compete.
Over the next few weeks, training for the Melbourne Competition will continue with the boys trying out last week to be part of the team. The trials will continue next week for both the boys and the 7/8 Girls. Please keep an eye on Xuno for dates.
Latasha Slocombe
Thank you to everyone who volunteered to support our first fundraiser for 2021.
Please encourage all your friends and family to head to Bunnings on Sunday June 6th and buy a sausage sandwich. Come along and join in the fun!
Do you shop at Rebel Sport? You can support our school every time you shop by linking your Rebel Active Membership to our school. 5% of what you spend is given to PFA to purchase sporting equipment for our school. If you’re not a member it’s free to join either online or ask a team member in store.
Have you sent an item/s to be sold at the uniform shop prior to 1 July 2020 and it hasn’t been sold? Can you please email Kate at sicgpandf@ignatius.vic.edu.au by 30 June 2021 to notify us if you are willing to donate these items. If you do not contact us prior to 30 June 2021 your item/s will be donated back to the school.
Please ensure any item that is sent in for sale has been freshly laundered, if not, it will be returned to you.
The next meeting will be held on Tuesday June 8th at 7.00pm in the Food Tech Room. We look forward to seeing you there. Even if you cannot make it to the monthly meetings, but think you might be able to be on call to help at the different things we are involved in, please get in touch with us by emailing sicgpandf@ignatius.vic.edu.au
Uniform Shop Opening Days and Times are as follows:
Wednesday 16th June 2-4pm
Wednesday 7th July 2-4pm
Wednesday 21st July 2-4pm
Do you know the Uniform Shop also sells brand new socks, ties and hats?
Items to be sold or donated can be dropped off on any of the above days or anytime at the front office.
We are always seeking Volunteers to help in the uniform shop. If you are available and have time to help out contact Kate Callaghan by emailing sicgpandf@ignatius.vic.edu.au . Training is provided.
The College canteen menu uses the 'traffic light system' to inform students, staff and parents of the College the healthier choice’s available at the College canteen (See 'Healthy Food @ School Guidelines' in our 'College Policies and Procedures' section for full details).
Canteen duty provides a much appreciated service to the school. It gives you the opportunity to meet and talk with other parents and also enables you to see your child’s school in action.
Five helpers are needed each day. Helpers will need to be at the canteen by 9:00am and will generally be finished by 1:30pm. If you can only be there part of the day, your help is greatly appreciated.
If you are able to assist, please contact Sandra Woodall at the College on 5251 1136.
Week starting June 7th 2021
7th June: B. Rees, E. Musella, B. Brinfield, L. Kelly
8th June: K. James, S. Peters, M. Dunstan, L. Tigani
9th June: K. Button, L. Dowling
10th June: S. Saraurer, M. White
11th June: K. Johnston, M. Wray, A. Richardson, S. Nyga
Week starting June 14th 2021
14th June: No Canteen. Queen's Birthday Public Holiday
15th June: P. Perkins, M. Jackson, S. Twaits, R. Morris
16th June: C. Ford, C. Poynton, L. Vella
17th June: F. Ferguson, C. Browne, M. Farrrell
18th June: No Canteen. Student Free Day
Most people steer clear from using destructive, toxic parenting strategies for fear of raising dysfunctional, emotionally unhealthy adults. Living vicariously through your kids or using fear to gain obedience are the types of strategies most parents avoid. So, what behaviours can parents practise that will help their kids function well, relate well to others and reach emotional maturity in adulthood? These behaviours will help your lay the foundation for your child to become an emotionally healthy adult.
Helping kids tolerate discomfort
While you don’t need to expose kids to pain just for the purpose of toughening them up, you don’t need to shield them from discomfort. Missing being picked for a team, a friend moving away and sitting a test that makes them nervous are the types of situations that reflect real adult-life. Providing children and young people with exposure to such experiences and giving them coping strategies such as positive distraction builds their resilience, which is essential for success and good mental acuity.
Validating their feelings
Telling kids to stop worrying or stop crying sends a message that emotions are bad. It teaches them to hide their emotions or fight their feelings. Similarly applying the terms ‘good’ or ‘bad’ to emotions sends a message that some emotions are not acceptable. The use of terms ‘pleasant’ and ‘unpleasant’ when discussing emotions is non-judgemental and shows your acceptance of all feelings. Let kids know through your language and behaviour that all emotions are a natural part of life, and that they provide important information to help them navigate their world. “Ahh! I see you feel upset about this” is the type of statement kids want to hear particularly when feelings are negative.
Letting kids live their own life
Parents have unrealised dreams as well as unhealed emotional scars. It can be tempting to put your own emotions onto your child or steer them away from areas of life that caused you pain. This practice places enormous pressure on children and restricts them from developing their own sense of self that comes from making your own life choices and living with the consequences. Kids require a certain amount of emotional space to develop their own interests and strengths that may be at odds with your expectations, which can be challenging when parenting small families.
Being emotionally available
One of the most difficult and time-consuming aspects of parenting is sharing a child or young person’s emotional burdens. Supporting a child who is sad, or helping a young person manage disappointment is draining emotional labour, requiring your full attention. Supporting, coaching and coaxing kids when they are down is when parents do some of their most important work.
In closing
Raising children and young people to reach emotional maturity is an often (unintentionally) neglected part of parenting. By paying attention to their emotions and responding positively rather than shutting them down when their emotions get the better of them you will help lay the foundation to live healthy, balanced lives.
Michael Grose
Michael Grose, founder of Parenting Ideas, is one of Australia’s leading parenting educators. He’s an award-winning speaker and the author of 12 books for parents including Spoonfed Generation, and the bestselling Why First Borns Rule the World and Last Borns Want to Change It . Michael is a former teacher with 15 years experience, and has 30 years experience in parenting education. He also holds a Master of Educational Studies from Monash University specialising in parenting education.
Local Community and Sporting groups you may be interested in.
Regional Parenting Service: Upcoming Free Parenting Forum
The Regional Parenting Service is running a Free Parenting Forum on Wednesday June 23rd called 'The Teen Brain'.
Presented by David Gillespie, one of Australia's most trusted non-fiction authors, who will detail how complicated a teenage brain is and discuss how to set out clear, reasonable and effective rules to help confidently manage your child's use of screens at a critical point in their lives.
Please see attached PDF for booking details.
Lifeboat Geelong: Combined Catholic Parishes Raffle
This year Lifeboat Geelong, a non-profit organisation that supports survivors of Church and Institutional abuse, is again participating in the Combined Catholic Parishes Raffle. The current diminished church attendance due to COVID-19 lockdowns has meant fewer parishes are involved this year, but the prize pool still has a value of $40,000.
1st Prize: Suzuki Balena Hatchback
2nd Prize: $5000 gift voucher
3rd Prize: $2000 gift voucher
4th - 6th Prizes: $1000 each gift voucher
7th - 20th Prizes: $500 each gift voucher
Tickets are just $2, and every ticket sold generates $1.50 for the work of Lifeboat.
Any family that is willing to sell a book of 10 tickets please contact Cath on 0439 199 400 or cath@lifeboatgeelong.com.au
Parent Education Events - Geelong Region: Term 2 2021
All Regional Parenting Services programs are free and will be offered face to face or online via Zoom, however, bookings are essential.
To book visit www.geelongaustralia.com.au/parenting or call us on 5272 4781.
There are a number of events planned for Term 2. Please see attached flyer for details: